Artificial intelligence has been trending for decades, but the implementation of artificial intelligence chatbots like OpenAI’s ChatGPT has recently taken the world by storm.
What’s wrong with AI chatbots?
The excitement around artificial intelligence has reached a point where every company earnings report seems to include AI at some point during the call. That’s only the case when companies have to report disappointing results and try to balance the bad news with hope that AI will somehow help the company grow in the future.
Many of the big tech companies like Google have touted their AI development in earnings calls to help focus investors on potential growth rather than basic health in an industry currently focused on cost-cutting. But it’s not just tech companies anymore, every industry is trying to enter the conversation with questionable or unnecessary uses of AI technology.
However, this is just the beginning, it looks like a repeat of the NFT situation where companies around the world are trying to get traffic from the latest innovative technology, even if it doesn’t necessarily do much for the business model. However, at least in some situations, AI technology appears to have a much stronger value proposition than NFTs. But who cares about these cases, what are the worst possible applications for artificial intelligence chatbots in the world today?
AI-powered streaming
Want to choose from a wealth of original content provided by Netflix (NFLX), Disney+ (DIS) and Paramount+ (PARA)?
Me neither!
Instead, a far better option would be if Netflix could just use all of our search history and recorded conversations to generate new content that we’d be interested in. Automating the process by combining different mental traits would also be great so we never run out of repeated content from overused franchises, which is absolutely not the case in the entertainment industry right now.
Streaming services could even make the choice for consumers on what to watch, forcing some households to watch a horrifying compilation of Aaron Rodgers playing soccer with Joe Rogan while Mando tries to protect Baby Yoda. In the meantime, other families can watch a mega reality show featuring the Kardashians, the Jersey Shore cast and the royal family bickering about how hard it is to live a normal life or not getting enough GTL time.
Automated morning coffee
If there’s a problem with Starbucks (SBUX), it’s that there just aren’t enough coffee, milk, and sugar combinations. The unicorn drink was fun and pumpkin spice lattes are always great, but the world just needs more ridiculous combinations of these three key ingredients.
In this predicament, artificial intelligence can help enormously to generate thousands of new coffee drinks. Best of all, using data from millions of customers, the AI can figure out that people who love Starbucks specialty drinks all have one thing in common: They don’t actually like coffee. At least not the taste of coffee, that only gets in the way of the pumpkin flavor enriched with cream and sugar.
So the first thing to do is take out the coffee of the coffee drink. Now easily find the right milk and cream to sugar ratio by analyzing recent sleep data and assessing how much sugar you need for an energy boost. Then simply add seasonal trends and recent search data to best assess whether the customer needs a splash of rainbow in their drink or a touch of leprechaun because St. Patrick’s Day is approaching.
Maximizing investment efficiency
Okay, so far it’s all been fun and games, but let’s finish with an implementation of artificial intelligence that can really improve people’s lives through investments. Investing is important to have the funds to do a variety of things later and to care for family members, but it can also be very confusing.
A common phrase in finance is that investors should first invest in what they believe in. If anyone thinks that Apple will continue to grow and dominate the market with its massive loyal customer base, then betting on Apple is a good place to start.
So why not just automate the whole process and let financial firms make investments simply based on a consumer’s purchase history? People buy products for a good reason, and they clearly need to enjoy the goods or services provided if they buy again. What signals more belief in a company than actually being a customer of that company?
Investors would no longer have to worry about reading charts and financial statements and would instead let their investments decide for them, allowing their portfolio to be heavily weighted in Aurora Cannabis (ACB), Boston Beer Company (SAM) as well as General Motors (GM) and O’Reilly Automotive (ORLY) as a package deal.
Wrap up
The use cases for artificial intelligence are really great all around as it eliminates so many unnecessary steps in businesses: customers making decisions, salespeople trying to trick customers into buying things. Now, with AI powered by the vast amounts of data that Big Tech aggregates, companies can make all those awkward decisions for you simply by using decisions you’ve already made. I look forward to the AI-divided decisions on what Costco (COST) is giving out for samples to pair with their amazing $1.50 hot dogs.
